The School of Hard Talks: How To Have Real Conversations with Your (Almost Grown) Kids

Psychologist Kline’s guide to navigating challenging conversational topics centers around asking questions and encouraging teens to find their own solutions. Many parents, already facing debilitating pressures in balancing their own employment with their children’s dizzying school and activity schedules, now find themselves facing the court of public opinion and their own expectations, especially in an increasingly social media–driven world. During challenging times, Kline suggests parents focus on creating a relationship grounded in mutual trust and respect instead of rules. With the goal of helping parents foster better bonds and safe spaces for their children to openly discuss their struggles, Kline invited a sample group of parents to participate in a study. They received guidance in group and individual settings to learn the skill of motivational interviewing, a technique the author believes may help teens make progress toward achieving personal goals and focus on problem-solving, even while facing challenging life situations. This model advocates a mirror view; as parents work through their own anxiety, they can better help their teens. This guide also explores the power of communication to help work through battles and conflicts without shame.