SOCIAL SCIENCES

Having Sex, Wanting Intimacy: Why Women Settle for One-Sided Relationships

by Jill P. Weber
Rowman & Littlefield. Mar. 2013. 200p. notes. bibliog. index. ISBN 9781442220201. $35; ebk. ISBN 9781442220218. PSYCH
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Clinical psychologist Weber exhorts girls and women to stop offering sex in the hope of gaining emotional intimacy with men, a process she terms "sextimacy." In a self-help volume more aptly targeted toward today's hook-up culture than Harville Hendrix's well-regarded Getting the Love You Want, Weber contends that women too often invalidate their own desires in partnerships that unilaterally meet the needs of the man. She describes the female biological need for bonding and urges women to expect mutual fulfillment and to refuse sex with partners who are unwilling and/or unable to provide emotional intimacy and safety outside of sex. The inclusion of contributing family pattern descriptions and self-assessment questions adds depth and utility to this excellent book.
VERDICT The author's dedication page reads simply "To Girls." Most sexually active females will see themselves or someone they know in this compassionate and helpful book. Recommended.
Reviewed by Linda Petty, Wimberley, TX , Mar 01, 2013
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