This Is How I Disappear

Clara is in crisis. Her workload as a marketing assistant at a publishing house is punishing, she’s reeling from a recent breakup, and she’s accepted an advance for a book she can’t bring herself to write. She’s been depressed for so long it’s become her status quo. “When I cry now,” she admits to a friend, “it’s just physics. Like I’m a vase full of water so I spill over. The tears are automatic. There’s nothing alive about it at all.” Her friends express concern, but they’re ultimately busy with their own lives, dealing with their own issues, and anyway, Clara’s too ashamed of feeling the way she does to accept their support. Malle’s (The League of Super Feminists) black-and-white illustration emphasizes body language and gesture, utilizing a thin line that highlights Clara’s fragility. That being said, there’s nothing sentimental here—this is a complex, at times brutally honest, story about a young woman at a breaking point.