Parenting Short Takes: Sex, Poop & Outdoor Play

Featuring Scott W. Cohen, Amber Madison & Linda Goldman

By Julianne J. Smith, Ypsilanti Dist. Lib., MI -- Library Journal, 01/21/2010

Just like life with children, some months in publishing are better than others. This column has some excellent offerings, and libraries can’t go wrong with any of the starred selections below. Sex is on the brain, and adolescent titles continue to get big play. I passed over three galleys on sleep (I can’t believe publishers see a market for this), but if your collection is getting out of date, drop me a line, and I will pull the recent releases together (smith@ypsilibrary.org). Until then, if you have Marc Weissbluth, you’re offering good advice.

Christopher, Todd. The Green Hour: A Daily Dose of Nature for Happier, Healthier, Smarter Kids. Trumpeter: Shambhala, dist. by Random. Mar. 2010. 240p. ISBN 978-1-59030-756-4. pap. $17.95. CHILD REARING
Christopher, founder of the National Wildlife Federation’s Green Hour web site (www.greenhour.org), here presents an activity-filled book on outdoor discovery and creative play, where “curiosity [is] your guide, and wonder [your] reward.” Research has long proven the benefit of outdoor play, yet many continue to replace “green time with screen time”—for instance, the results of a University of Cambridge study showed that eight-year-old children can identify more Pokemon characters than common wildlife species. There have been several excellent activity guides this year (e.g., Jennifer Ward's Let’s Go Outside!), and this joins the ranks. Each book is a bit different, so continue purchasing them, as patrons will use them like cookbooks. Enthusiastically recommended.

Cohen, Scott W. Eat, Sleep, Poop: A Common Sense Guide to Your Baby’s First Year. Scribner. Apr. 2010. 288p. index. ISBN 978-1-4391-1706-4. pap. $16. CHILD REARING
Award-winning pediatrician Cohen might be the next best thing to bringing your mother with you when your first baby comes home. (Case in point: this reviewer came home, sat in a chair with a twin on each arm, looked at her mother, and said, “So now what?”) Inevitably the top-to-bottom inspection begins, and most new parents find a million things “wrong,” which could be symptomatic of horrifying diseases that everyone at the hospital probably missed. Using common language, Cohen is great at identifying parental concerns—such as why baby looks like a conehead or a bowling ball or Friar Tuck—and he responds with reassuring answers, providing just enough information to assuage worries. Every entry ends with a “Common Sense Bottom Line,” a one- or two-line answer that the mildly anxious parent can turn to in a hurry. Of the multitude of baby guides out there, this is, hands down, one of the best in years. Buy multiples.

Denay, Jessica. The Hot Mom To Be Handbook: Look and Feel Great from Bump to Baby. Avon A: Avon. Mar. 2010. 352p. ISBN 978-0-06-178735-5. pap. $16.99. CHILD REARING
There is a plethora of girlfriend books aimed at first-time moms, most featuring embarrassing attempts at humor via mock horror at bodily changes. Denay, founder of Hot Moms Club (www.hotmomsclub.com), joins the ranks with this handbook for the young and newly pregnant set. Seeing chapter titles such as "Daddy Gadgetitis" and "Get Glowing" and an it-was-all-worthwhile horror story preface by Bachelorette star Trista Sutter, readers can easily ascertain the style of content and purchase accordingly. Some vignettes are fairly cute; most are predictable. The book does have a good product listing with web sites, making it timely but soon-to-be out-of-date. A similar title with a more literary bent is Anna Johnson's The Yummy Mummy Manifesto: Baby, Beauty, Balance, and Bliss.

Fisk, Maria Chesley. Teach Your Kids To Think! Simple Tools You Can Use Every Day. That’s Good Thinking. Mar. 2010. 107p. bibliog. ISBN 978-0-9841998-0-8. pap. $16.95. CHILD REARING
Educational consultant Fisk offers a solid book on metacognition to help parents teach their children how to think more smartly by exercising the four intelligences: analytical, creative, social and emotional, and practical. Activities are in the form of discussion questions and range from dissecting problems to trial and error to planning how to handle difficult situations. While the audience is listed as children ages four to 12, 12 may be stretching it. Younger children will definitely enjoy the opportunity to respond to questions such as, “Would you prefer, for just one day, to be a bunny or to be a monkey?” This might have worked equally well as a chapter in a more comprehensive book on cognition, but for those with the budget to purchase, it will likely circulate well.

Goldman, Linda. Great Answers to Difficult Questions About Sex: What Children Need To Know. Jessica Kingsley. Feb. 2010. 112p. ISBN 978-1-84905-804-9. pap. $15.95. CHILD REARING
In this fourth title in the “Great Answers” series, counselor Goldman provides sample answers to and ways to discuss common childhood questions about sex. Arguing for honest dialog that begins early to encourage a family tone of trust and safety, she offers answers that are candid yet age appropriate to help even the most reluctant parent find a way to communicate honestly and without embarrassment. Covering everything from where babies come from, to describing sex, to defining gay, this is a terrific title that is well worth the money. Like the other titles in the series (e.g., Goldman’s Great Answers to Difficult Questions About Death), this will be helpful to anyone who works with or cares about children.

Madison, Amber. Talking Sex with Your Kids: Keeping Them Safe and You Sane—by Knowing What They’re Really Thinking. Adams Media. Mar. 2010. 256p. ISBN 978-1-60550-662-3. pap. $14.95. CHILD REARING
Madison (Hooking Up: A Girl’s All-Out Guide to Sex and Sexuality) might be young (she’s 26), but that hasn’t stopped her from becoming an award-winning safe sex lecturer. Bridging the teen world and that of parents, she is in a prime position to both empathize with parents and understand current teen culture. Given alarming study results about teen pregnancy rates and the inefficacy of abstinence-only programs, this title should be mandatory reading for all parents. Madison’s style is factual and candid but respects the awkwardness of the subject and has just enough humor. Her statistics and references are reliable, up-to-date, and in context. Covering myths, contraception, sexually transmitted diseases, and issues unique to boys and girls, this is an all-around excellent title. The Goldman book reviewed above in combination with this for older children should put parents on solid ground.

Morella, John R. Give Teens a Break!: A Positive Look at Teens. Millennial Mind. 2010. 252p. ISBN 978-1-58982-583-3. pap. $22. CHILD REARING
Psychologist Morella thinks teens are getting a bad rap and that adults’ perceptions of them are becoming self-fulfilling prophecies. Subscribing to the inventionist theory that adolescence as we know it was created in the early 20th century in response to the industrial revolution, he gives good historical synopses of adolescence theories. He goes on to discuss myths about teens, dispelling some better than others with a combination of published research, his own survey of teens, and his experience as a practicing psychologist. Ultimately, the target audience is academic but somewhat unclear. The invention of adolescence is a popular theory right now, so look for more works in the future. Robert Epstein’s 570-page whopper, Teen 2.0, will be reviewed in the February column. Morella’s title is optional.

Morgan, Linda. Beyond Smart: Boosting Your Child’s Social, Emotional, and Academic Potential. Parent Map. Feb. 2010. 148p. ISBN 978-0-9823454-2-9. pap. $16.95. CHILD REARING
Journalist Morgan attempts to cull the essential truths from the latest research in neuroscience and education to give parents that elusive edge in boosting baby’s smart quotient. This type of book makes parenting feel like a competition, child development like something that can be hurried, and child rearing in the early years seem like a make-it-or-break-it window. Research does, undoubtedly, show windows of opportunity for growth; however, it mostly validates the evolutionary behavior that parents have successfully exhibited for generations (rock a crying baby, speak in parentese, etc.). If you must recommend something that “makes your kid smarter,” go with David Elkind’s The Power of Play, which should convince parents to ease off.

Riley, Tim. First the Broccoli, then the Ice Cream: A Parent’s Guide to Deliberate Discipline. Two Fish Bks. 2010. 240p. index. ISBN 978-0-9841423-1-6. pap. $15.95. CHILD REARING
Psychologist Riley has written an ideal parenting book on discipline. In fact, his advice transcends his own subject and could easily serve as an entire parenting philosophy. Likening discipline to gravity, a fact of life that gives no warnings, explanations, or second chances, he stresses the importance of consistency and repetition as the foundation for emotional stability in children. Emphasizing that rules without consequences are just suggestions and reminding us that anything over seven-words is a lecture, he has an understated and humorous approach that is personal and effective. Riley’s style is warm and engaging, and he clearly cares for children and their well-being. A good discipline title for the youngest bunch is Beth A. Grosshans’s Beyond Time-Out and for older kids and teens look to William H. Hughes’s Raise Winning Kids Without a Fight. Riley’s solid contribution is highly recommended.

Young, Hal & Melanie Young. Raising Real Men: Surviving, Teaching and Appreciating Boys. Great Waters Pr. 2010. 253p. index. ISBN 978-0-9841443-0-3. pap. $15. CHILD REARING
Husband-and-wife team Hal and Melanie Young, the parents of six boys, present a biblical take on appreciating the rambunctiousness of boys, arguing that boys (and girls) are “a picture of the image of God, tragically marred by sin…and that our focus must be on leading our sons into godly manhood, not just trying to manage them.” They lament the portrayal of Christ as effeminate, unimpressive, and feeble rather than as the savior of mankind and the conqueror of death. While they certainly have a good handle on the challenges that young boys can present, their strict conservatism limits this title to religious homeschooling collections. For libraries with pertinent collections, Pam Farrel and Doreen Hanna’s Raising a Modern-Day Princess would complement nicely.