Foreverland: On the Divine Tedium of Marriage

In a world where marriage is often presented as either a problem or a solution, “Ask Polly” advice columnist Havrilesky (How To Be a Person in the World) drives home the point that such binary oppositions are fictions—as irrelevant and dangerous as the happily-ever-after stories of Disney princesses. In wittily titled chapters that foreground the tension between expectation and reality, Havrilesky takes readers through her own experiences of “tedium” and the divine, while also opening up broader issues annexed to the institution of marriage and its measurements of success. She recounts meeting her husband, describes the complexities of falling in love, and asks why American society tends to fixate on the concept of love. The book explores rom-coms, romance novels, and the author’s experience as an advice columnist, where she answers difficult questions relating to marriage and divorce, love and loss. Havrilesky is at her best when considering the idea of romance and the pressure to become overinvested in marriage and parenting at the expense of one’s own well-being.