Self-Help Reviews, February 15, 2011 

Alman, Brian with Stephen Montgomery. The Voice: Overcome Negative Self-Talk and Discover Your Inner Wisdom. Sterling Ethos. 2011. c.176p. index. ISBN 9781402777103. $19.95. SELF-HELP
Authority on mental fitness/mind-body wellness Alman’s (Keep It Off: Your Key to Weight Loss for Life) thrust in this concise book is that people have healing powers within themselves that can be unleashed to overcome any physical or emotional challenge. The trick is to discern the healthy voice from the negative messages that prevent positive growth. Alman’s action steps involve experiencing, judging, and resolving the threat to well-being. Exercises include looking at one’s early family life, practicing mindfulness techniques, and creating visual imagery. This book will doubtless help anyone who is plagued by cravings, lack of confidence, or stress.

Bassett, Lucinda. The Solution: Conquer Your Fear, Control Your Future. Sterling. Feb. 2011. c.288p. index. ISBN 9781402779886. $22.95. SELF-HELP
Bassett (From Panic to Power; Life Without Limits) offers a 21-day emotional makeover for taking control of one’s life. Her prescription for inner self-confidence and strength is first to understand one’s core story (upbringing and life experience) and use it as motivation for success, rather than an excuse for self-sabotage and lack of good fortune. Bassett spends much time dissecting worry and depression and gives exercises for overcoming harmful thoughts. The exercises seem well thought out and helpful and can be undertaken at one’s own pace. She offers a variety of quizzes, sidebars, and celebrity stories, which will leave readers feeling empowered and positive about life. Well done.

Brokaw, Sarah. Fortytude: Making the Next Decades the Best Years of Your Life—Through the 40s, 50s, and Beyond. Hyperion. Mar. 2011. c.288p. bibliog. ISBN 9781401341190. $23.99. SELF-HELP
Through her experience in leading discussion groups with women nationwide, licensed therapist Brokaw knows that women who travel through midlife most easily are those who’ve fostered five core values—grace, connectedness, accomplishment, adventure, and spirituality—which empower them to be their most authentic and actualized selves. Thankfully, Brokaw’s message does not consist of clichés and conventional advice. She provides short biographies of women who have overcome the odds to achieve well-being and satisfaction. The chapters validating stay-at-home moms and stepmothers will be particularly appreciated in those demographics. Inspirational for those a decade or two below and beyond forty.

Cahill, Danny. Harper’s Rules: A Recruiter’s Guide to Finding a Dream Job and the Right Relationship. Greenleaf. Apr. 2011. c.156p. ISBN 9781608321001. $21.95. SELF-HELP
Headhunter Cahill offers a twist to the usual how-to genre by telling an allegorical tale about a charming headhunter, Harper, who guides successful executive Casey through her divorce and lackluster job. Harper finds similarities between searching for a better job and a happier love life and recommends identical strategies for both as when preparing for interviews/dates, following up afterward, and considering offers/playing the field. One of his most original suggestions is to use the language of work in relationships. For example, instead of saying that one falls in love, the act should be thought of as accepting an offer of love. While the book contains helpful advice, readers may be put off by the arrogant Harper and the contrived tale.

Felder, Raoul & Barbara Victor. The Good Divorce: How To Walk Away Financially Sound and Emotionally Happy. St. Martin’s. Mar. 2011. c.288p. index. ISBN 9780312592967. $24.99. SELF-HELP
Attorney Felder, an expert in divorce litigation, and Victor (The Last Crusade: Religion and the Politics of Misdirection) have put together a comprehensive guide to all aspects of divorce, from choosing a lawyer to making a new life. They cover the issues of child abuse, grounds for divorce, and the differences between family court and Supreme Court cases. They warn readers that fair is a nebulous term, gender equality is a myth, and in the end it is the ability to compromise that can make divorce civilized and relatively painless. Appendixes provide a legal sample intake questionnaire and a sample prenuptial agreement. Highly recommended for anyone considering a divorce.

Frankel, Lois P. & Carol Frohlinger Nice Girls Just Don’t Get It: 99 Ways To Win the Respect Your Deserve, the Success You’ve Earned, and the Life You Want. Crown Archetype. Apr. 2011. c.320p. bibliog. ISBN 9780307590466. $23. SELF-HELP
According to Frankel (Nice Girls Don’t Get the Corner Office) and Frohlinger, cofounder of Negotiating Women, Inc., women who are “nice girls” are held back in relationships, friendships, and all aspects of their personal lives. It’s not enough to plan a strategy to overcome self-deprecating behaviors; one must envision and enact tactics as well. The 99 tactics they put forward range from assessing the messenger and allowing others to save face, to creating boundaries and avoiding perfectionism. Their common-sense solutions and psychological backup provide a starting place for any woman wanting to overcome the polite “niceness” holding her back and move forward in a more egalitarian fashion. A great shot in the arm for all working women.

Miller, Caroline Adams & Michael B. Frisch. Creating Your Best Life: The Ultimate Life List Guide. Sterling. Feb. 2011. c.288p. illus. bibliog. index. ISBN 9781402779985. pap. $14.95. SELF-HELP
Miller (psychology, Univ. of Texas, Dallas) and clinical psychologist Frisch pull from psychological theories on goal setting, social cognitive theory, and learned optimism to help readers achieve goals contributing to their quality of life. The authors emphasize the necessity of creating a life list, which sets goals as to where an individual wants to go in life and what he or she wants to leave behind as a legacy. They provide ideas for happiness boosters (e.g., engaging in physical exercise and volunteer work) and willpower boosters (e.g., hiding temptations and getting rid of clutter) as well as numerous life list exercises and work sheets. A particularly realistic chapter covers overcoming hurdles and failures. A+ for the authors’ ability to integrate science with a practical application for the general public. One of the best of its kind.

Sanders, Tim. Today We Are Rich: Harnessing the Power of Total Confidence. Tyndale House. Apr. 2011. c.250p. ISBN 9781414339115. $19.99. SELF-HELP
In this semiautobiographical book, Sanders (Love Is the Killer App: How To Win Business and Influence Friends) shares one of the most important motivational thoughts he gained from his grandmother—that one has to get back to basics to feel confident and move forward through life. His stories aim to put readers into the “good loop,” where positive actions lead to positive thinking. Reading this is like sitting through a motivational seminar that has lasted way too long. Sanders’s lessons and principles are valid, but the stream-of-consciousness narrative mixed with quotations by gurus such as Napoleon Hill and a sprinkling of philosophers add up to too much. Great intentions; weak delivery.

Seligman, Martin. Flourish: A Visionary New Understanding of Happiness and Well-Being. Free Pr: S. & S. Apr. 2011. c.336p. illus. bibliog. ISBN 9781439190753. $26. SELF-HELP
Former president of the division of clinical psychology of the American Psychological Association, Seligman (psychology, Univ. of Pennsylvania) wrote the book on positive psychology. Here, he goes beyond his previous volumes (Learned Optimism; Authentic Happiness) by explaining how to achieve well-being by mastering its components—positive emotions, engagement, relationships, meaning and purpose, and accomplishment. Seligman expands his prescription for personal happiness and demonstrates how teaching resiliency to young people, those in the armed services, and business personnel has helped them overcome trauma and flourish in their environments. Seligman includes over 40 pages of annotated bibliography, websites, and interviews. This is particularly helpful for people who want to know why learned optimism works and the variety of venues in which it has been successful.

Van de Mark, Donald. The Good Among the Great: 19 Traits of the Most Admirable, Creative, and Joyous People. Columbia Island Pr. Apr. 2011. c.280p. bibliog. index. ISBN 9780984606122. pap. $15.95. SELF-HELP
Van de Mark, in his 25 years of interviewing for CNN, discovered that some people were not just successful but exemplary. He studied modern high achievers who were also beloved characters, found 19 shared personality traits, and integrated his findings with the models of Abraham Maslow. In this distinctive book, he focuses on each particular trait and gives an example of someone who possesses it; in the “Integrity” chapter, Warren Buffett, and in “Empathetic,” Charles Schwab. Many of his examples are not household names but are as inspiring as the celebrities. An essential read for those wanting to improve themselves and the world.