Parenting Short Takes: "Sneaky Fitness" & Child Rearing Equality

Featuring Susan Bartell, Missy Chase Lapine & Cathy Puett Miller

By Julianne J. Smith, Ypsilanti Dist. Lib., MI -- Library Journal, 12/17/2009

The starred titles this month represent a humorous but realistic flow in how parenting often works: start with a fully engaged partner; plan and prepare for your desired outcome; when reality inevitably strikes, sneak it in! We run the gamut both in terms of quality and of applicable audiences. I applaud the design that went into Sneaky Fitness to make it so easy to read and use; I loved the realistic and respectful style that went into ESP; and Reading Readiness was brilliant in its brevity (knowing when to stop writing is often a problem with such research-rich subjects).

On the audience end, all parents will relate to the annoying questions kids ask. Yet not many of us believe in millennial or indigo children. Despite this, these titles do have a place in libraries, as we serve as repositories for exploration, not just excellence.

Are we covering what you would like in this column? Are the reviews helpful? Email me at any time to share your thoughts at smith@ypsilibrary.org.

Bartell, Susan. The Top 50 Questions Kids Ask: Pre-K Through 2nd Grade. 240p. ISBN 978-1-4022-1915-3.
Bartell, Susan. The Top 50 Questions Kids Ask: 3rd Through 5th Grade. 256p. ISBN 978-1-4022-1916-0.
ea. vol: Sourcebooks. Mar. 2010. pap. $10.99. CHILD REARING 
Psychologist and frequent morning show contributor Bartell presents 50 of the most tedious, annoying, and relentless questions children ask, summarizing what is likely motivating the question and offering strategies on how best to respond. The questions are grouped by subject (e.g., money, nagging, and sex) and will ring true with parents the world over. They range from the thoughtful (e.g., Is there a God?) to the awkward (e.g., Where do babies come from?) to the utterly maddening (e.g., Do I have to?). Obviously, parents will bring different values to many of these, but Bartell provides good examples of how to think out a response that avoids further argument but preserves good communication. If nothing else, one has to admire an author who tackles head-on things like, "Is God a boy or a girl?"

Ball, MaryAnn. Preparing the Millennial Child: Your Personal Parenting Class and Relationship Guide. Words on the Loose. Dec. 2009. 461p. ISBN 978-0-578-01433-3. $34.95. CHILD REARING
Ball, a mother of eight and a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints, has adapted her parenting class into a whopper of a guide for those who believe the Second Coming is not only near but that millennial children have "specific pre-ordained assignments and missions to prepare the Earth for this event." Some of the more telling characteristics of these children include their innate understanding and response to energy patterns, their ability to hear and sometimes see angels, and their arrival on Earth with a higher-than-average energy vibration. Each chapter ends with reader assignments. While Ball’s parenting approach is worthy, her book will turn off everyone but her fellow believers.

Farrel, Pam & Doreen Hanna. Raising a Modern-Day Princess: Inspiring Purpose, Value, and Strength in Your Daughter. Tyndale House. Jan. 2010. 256p. ISBN 978-1-58997-574-3. $13.99. CHILD REARING
This Focus on the Family title explains both why and how to create a rite of passage for young Christian women, similar to the Bat Mitzvah celebration in the Jewish tradition. Using princess metaphors throughout, the authors hope that all young women can "step into the court of the King of Kings and claim their tiaras." Only the most conservative Christians will feel at home with this material; most readers will squirm at the assumption of feminine subservience.

Feinstein, Sheryl. Inside the Teenage Brain: Parenting a Work in Progress. Rowman & Littlefield. Dec. 2009. 148p. index. ISBN 978-1-60709-118-9. $24.95. CHILD REARING
Feinstein (education, Augustana Coll.) has a humorous but respectful understanding of adolescents, accurately quipping, "If men are from Mars and women are from Venus, then adolescents are truly from outer space." She explains the biological differences between teenage and adult brains, helps parents identify their parenting style, and then looks at strategies that do and do not work with teens. She addresses common problem areas like conformity, peer pressure, and sex, following up with concise suggestions for approaching the issues. Chapters on family rules and teens at risk complete this commendable title on Adolescents 101.

Lapine, Missy Chase & Larysa Didio. Sneaky Fitness: Fun, Foolproof Ways To Slip Fitness into Your Child’s Everyday Life. Running Pr. Jan. 2010. 288p. index. ISBN 978-0-7624-3795-5. $19.95. CHILD REARING
Lapine hit the best-sellers list with The Sneaky Chef and is probably headed there again. Fearing that exercise is as "antiquated as a VHS player" and with 32 percent of children classified as overweight, she and celebrity trainer Didio show parents how to bring age-specific exercise easily into children’s lives. They correctly assert that kids can get into a habit of inactivity and tend not to prioritize things like "health" or other pursuits that don’t have instant results. Broken down by age groups, the exercises—each listed with calorie calculations—are designed to weave cardio, strength training, and flexibility into everyday routines. The activities are simple, inexpensive, and fun (e.g., kids will love playing driveway "hockey" with a giant ice cube and brooms). Also included are new Sneaky Chef recipes, which are essentially the equivalent of spiking your kids’ food with nutrient-rich foods of similar colors.

Miller, Cathy Puett. Anytime Reading Readiness: Fun and Easy Family Activities That Prepare Your Child to Read. Maupin House. Jan. 2010. 79p. ISBN 978-1-934338-74-2. $11.95. CHILD REARING
Avid reading is the biggest indicator of academic success; parents should be motivated to ensure their kids start early in exploring the world of words and books. Children’s literacy consultant Miller begins with a reading readiness scale to help parents identify how ready their child is to read. Assessment results coincide with suggested activities, which are clearly outlined and easy to do; young children will likely find them fun and exciting. Miller also includes a chapter on creating a literacy-rich home and offers a terrific resource list and notes. A small jewel appropriate for both home and library; highly recommended.

Vachon, Marc & Amy Vachon. Equally Shared Parenting: Rewriting the Rules for a New Generation of Parents. Perigee: Putnam. Jan. 2010. 228p. index. ISBN 978-0-399-53558-1. $23.95. CHILD REARING
Parents and the brains behind EquallySharedParenting.com, Marc Vachon and Amy Vachon describe equally shared parenting (ESP) as the "purposeful practice of two parents sharing equally in the four domains of child rearing, housework, breadwinning, and time for self," resulting in each partner doing only half the work, owning half the responsibility, and getting half of the power. The authors do an outstanding job of arguing against the model of Dad as apprentice parent and the assumption that mom does child rearing best, acknowledging that the cultural standard of maternity leave and the realities of breastfeeding start off most new parents on an inequitable path. This is not a theoretical piece for burned-out moms seeking more help with the housework, but a working document that motivated couples can turn to for guidance in designing a more balanced relationship. Somewhere above, Betty Friedan is cheering. This columnist is shouting from the rafters. Brilliant!