Self-Help

According to couples therapist and educator Babits, the "middle ground" is the place where neither partner dominates, each approaches problems productively, and love and compassion come alive. His realistic directions on reaching the middle ground include seeing issues from the other's point of view, emphasizing the positive, and developing patience. It would be most beneficial, he notes, if both partners practiced the steps of "letting go of anger" or "paraphrasing the other's point" together. But even if just one of them uses this book as a tool for introspection, the relationship—whether straight or gay—should greatly improve. Worksheets and exercises are included. Recommended for public libraries.

Gearing this book toward women who want to be stay-at-home wives but feel guilty about it, Basham (The Weekly Standard) argues that such a lifestyle would actually enhance one's marriage. She points out that marriages thrive when the husband sees himself as the breadwinner and that today's college-educated woman is in an excellent position to guide him toward professional heights. She urges wives to give motivational pep talks, share intuitions in a specific (not emotional) manner, go to their husband's business-related social events, and look for opportunities to assist him when needed. Although Basham claims her vision is not a throw-back to the Fifties, a closer reading reveals it is just that, with a little twist of language for 2008. An optional purchase.

According to marriage and family therapist Brantley and massage therapist Hanauer, the practice of loving kindness helps believers offer unconditional kindness and compassion to themselves, their loved ones, adversaries, and anyone in between. Through specific techniques, meditations, and actions, readers will not only learn how to forgive but will be better able to overcome fears, judgments, worries, and pain. The book is essentially a composite of mantras, organized into such chapters as "Be Your Own Friend," "Open the Box of Love," and "We All Make Mistakes." Case studies help the reader apply the material. Best-suited for libraries short on alternative health/spirituality materials.

From page one, leadership coach Brown challenges readers to take bold action to realize their dreams. He discusses such barriers to success as fear of the unknown or lack of energy and provides practical methods, inspiration, and motivational stories to help stay on track. Since each day is directly impacted by the quality of thoughts that flow through one's mind, the key strategy, according to Brown, is to change negative thinking into positive self-talk. He spends several chapters on the "how-to" of doing that. It should be noted that Brown's point of view is decidedly Christian, and while subtle in some cases, it is somewhat off-putting in others. The material is sound and would be beneficial to all who read it, but those with a religious bent would appreciate it the most. Public libraries should consider if demand warrants.

Geared toward men 18 years of age and older, Clink's (The Layguide) latest is a sophisticated version of the genre of books with titles like How To Pick Up Women that were advertised in comic books back in the Fifties. Clink provides advice on every conceivable step to "scoring," including how to develop self-confidence, master pick-up lines, and control the conversation. To his credit, he does tell men to obey a woman's definite NO in Step 36, "Getting Past No." If the advice didn't smack of manipulation, Clink's suggestions for eliciting a woman's thoughts and values would be commendable. Whether men will actually go to the library to seek his book, however, is anyone's guess. Guardedly recommended.

"Who in the world suggested that restaurateur Durbin should write a book?" one might ask when browsing this chronicle of the author's life. Durbin's recipe for success is interspersed with tales of growing up in Jalisco, Mexico, partying in Durango, CO, and finding the right woman and second career in Sedona, AZ. While Durbin's main life lesson and advice to the reader is that money doesn't equal happiness, he made his first million at a young age, which allowed him to relax and enjoy the good things in life without working. His advice on life, relationships, and business is self-taught and has some validity, but myriad self-help books simply say it better. Not recommended.

And now, just for fun comes this reversible little book, one side for optimists, the other for pessimists—full of quotations, proverbs, statistics, and diary extracts from well-known persons who look at the glass as either half-empty or half-full. Edworthy (The Curious Gardner's Almanac) and retired magazine publisher Cramsie cover topics from baldness and fashion to lawyers and wealth. In the optimism portion of the book, for example, Winston Churchill is quoted as saying, "If you are going through hell, keep going." Honore de Balzac, quoted in "pessimism," notes: "Believe everything you hear about the world; nothing is too impossibly bad." This enjoyable read will be appreciated by most patrons. Recommended to all public libraries.

Writing for the Colbert-Stewart generation, US Weekly staff writer Holloway and Metro writer/editor Robinson pave the way for those who are trying to get through the often-disheartening journey of meeting one's soul mate. In a humorous and sardonic style, the authors cover the basics of the process, from meeting wealthy singles at a martini bar to finding an apartment together. A particularly funny chapter on meeting the parents stipulates that there are good holidays on which to meet (e.g., Labor and Memorial Day) and bad ones (e.g., Thanksgiving, Christmas). Occasional quizzes spice up the text. The title alone will stimulate interest among those who are in the market for a partner. Recommended for public libraries.

Containing more than 260 illustrations, Body Language 101 serves as a comprehensive dictionary of nonverbal communication. Human behaviorist Lambert uses research from the areas of kinesics, zoology, gender studies, and psychology to demonstrate how people use body language to reinforce speech or indicate their mood. The guide triple-indexes the material, with one section organized by body parts (e.g., arms-linked, legs-crossed), the second by actions and their meanings (e.g., signs of conflict, sincerity, and deceit), and the third by emotions and meanings (e.g., embarrassment, ownership). A particularly interesting chapter covers signs of deceit, with photographs illustrating dishonest gaze behavior and foot actions. This is easily one of the best books on the subject, even surpassing Susan Quilliam's Body Language. Highly recommended for all libraries.

Through an analysis of the life and leadership style of the Lakota leader Crazy Horse, Marshall (The Journey of Crazy Horse), himself a Lakota, discusses the characteristics that Native Americans value in their leaders. Crazy Horse, according to Marshall, demonstrated rather than taught leadership and represented selflessness, morality, experience, honesty, and responsibility. His guiding philosophy of knowing oneself, knowing one's friends, knowing the enemy, and leading the way has relevance today. Marshall illustrates each principle with case studies that include historical battles and present-day office politics. While his message that leadership by example is more powerful than leadership by power is well-developed, only those with an interest in Native American history would read through it. Buy if community interest warrants.

Written by distinguished Nobel Peace Prize nominee Nicholas (Niagara Coll., Ontario, psychology), this inspirational book offers suggestions for a variety of life's undertakings. In six chapters, Nicholas presents profound ideas from Eastern and Western philosophy, psychology, and literature in the hope that the reader will reflect and enjoy a "conversation" with those eminent writers. If followed, the guidelines should help the reader enjoy inner peace and calm, develop a dazzling mind, experience the joy of genuine intimacy, be ever young in spirit, achieve success, and find abundant energy for daily life. While Nicholas presents a stunning array of quotations and thoughts, transitions from one idea to the next are choppy, and concepts are not always fully developed. In addition, too many ideas are packed into one book, making the text underwhelming. For larger libraries.

According to Vorgan (The Memory Bible) and Small, one of America's leading neuroscientists, digital technology has altered the neural circuitry in human brains and triggered an evolutionary process in just one generation. The authors identify the inherent problems and challenges this poses, providing a technology toolkit filled with strategies to preserve one's humanity and keep up with the latest technology. They make their case based on abundant research in the areas of health, psychology, pediatrics, education, business, and technology. Their exercises include developing face-to-face communication skills as well as mastering electronic games. A compelling as well as timely read, this is highly recommended for all libraries.