Self-Help

Author of the Essence best seller If You Want Closure in a Relationship, Start with Your Legs, Big Boom, a 6'6", 360-pound celebrity bodyguard and self-proclaimed former (now married) "player," draws on past experiences to help women recognize the games devious men play to seduce women. While he dedicates most of the book to increasing women's self-esteem and empowering them to demand satisfying relationships, he also includes practical pointers on helping them avoid frequently made mistakes, e.g., having sex too early in the relationship or falling for material things. This is not a polished self-help guide; Big Boom writes from the heart, calling on God at certain turns and clear thinking at others. And that is the book's strength and its weakness. Boom's popularity with African American audiences recommends his latest book to libraries where his previous book was popular.

Picking up where Rhonda Byrne's The Secret left off, coauthors D'Aoust (lecturer, Philosophical Research Soc.) and Parfrey (Cult Rapture: Revelations of the Apocalyptic Mind) explain how believers and visionaries from a variety of teachings have improved their well-being using mental powers. They guide readers through several Hermetic teachings, shed light on the New Thought spiritual movement, explain how the Christ mythos and Jewish kabbalistic texts borrowed from the Hermetic tradition, and reveal how many of today's get-rich-quick schemes have roots in Hermetic laws. While not for everyone, this book provides an unbiased view of the teachings of secret societies and will interest many patrons. Recommended for all libraries.

Davis (The Ex Files) has put together an entertaining and amazingly on-target astrological guide for women wanting to understand their ex-boyfriends. In it, she provides relevant details about men's personalities via their sun signs, also offering information such as why an ex will or will not be missed and instructions on getting him back or keeping him away. Particularly interesting is her revelation of how women are likely to handle breakups with their boyfriends based on both parties' sun signs. Fun to browse, this will generate interest in all libraries. Recommended.

According to Gartrell (psychiatry, Ctr. of Excellence in Women's Health, Univ. of California, San Francisco), guilt-free no's are hard to come by for most women. However, she notes, this doesn't have to be perceived as a negative trait, for women find meaning in caring and being connected to others. All the same, Gartrell writes, showing kindness is not the same as offering oneself up as a doormat. She provides case studies of more than 100 accomplished women from diverse backgrounds to demonstrate how they have learned to be assertive in difficult situations and recommends ways of saying no that allow women to be considerate without jeopardizing their well-being. Practical assistance for a prevalent problem; recommended for all libraries.

As Haltzman (psychiatry & human behavior, Brown Univ.; The Secrets of Happily Married Men) knows—he's been married for 20 years—the idea of shaping one's marriage without it seeming like another job appeals to most women. Together with DiGeronimo (Raising Baby Green), he here proposes that men are hardwired to please women and that if a knowledgeable wife tailors her message to the way her husband can hear it, she will enjoy a deeper connection and achieve happiness without compromise. In a manner somewhat similar to John Gray's in Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus, the authors advise married female readers to speak in shorter sentences, directly ask for what they want, and take charge of their own spiritual and intellectual needs.

Couples counselor Isaacson (The Birth Order Effect: How To Better Understand Yourself and Others) and writer Schneider, meanwhile, help readers navigate the rough spots of marriage—e.g., finances, children, health practices, and potential infidelity—by providing guidelines for fair fighting and ideas for playing in the bedroom. The latter book is a kind of encyclopedia on what to expect in marriage, while the former is more a users' guide. Both are well done and recommended to update marital self-help sections.

Using the 1993 movie Groundhog Day as a springboard to illustrate the principle of repetitive thought patterns, professional entrepreneur and lecturer Hannam (emeritus, Oxford Univ. Environmental Change Inst.; coauthor, Take Charge of Your Mind) discusses how to change one's inner life to see the beauty in the world. According to Hannam, the "groundhog effect" is the force that keeps people feeling stuck and powerless to change. Only by breaking free of this looplike effect, he posits, can they liberate themselves to enjoy healthy habits, relationships, and careers. Hannam instructs readers on how to do this on first a personal and then an environmental level, offering a fresh approach to changing old behaviors. Recommended for all libraries.

In the first of these books offering perspectives on having meaningful and satisfying sexual relationships, sex therapist Kerner (She Comes First: The Thinking Man's Guide to Pleasuring a Woman) avers that many Americans are bloated from a steady diet of sexual junk food and need to detoxify their systems to find sexual pleasure again. His program calls on readers to examine their intimate lives in the context of early family relationships and then pursue healthy ways of satisfying inner hungers. Kerner spends equal time on guidelines for singles and couples alike. The measures he recommends are not an easy fix and involve participants' complete honesty and vulnerability as well as a willingness to abstain from sex for 30 days.

Comedian Pierce and journalist Morgan's book, while also designed to help couples have more, frequent, mutually fulfilling sex that promotes a deeper connection, takes a different approach. Besides offering a number of ways to improve general communication, it provides nitty-gritty details on such topics as pleasing both women and men, getting through sex "droughts," and dealing with fantasies and the temptation to stray.

Sex Detox, as it's written primarily for the reader who has OD'd on sex and recognizes a need for change, serves a somewhat limited readership and is recommended for larger libraries. Doorbell is for all libraries owing to its easy format.

From professional organizer and author Leeds (The Zen of Organizing) comes the perfect book for anyone wanting to find important papers instantly or have a navigable closet. The author divides getting organized into 12 monthly sections with four weekly tasks. The first week of every month is devoted to journaling and understanding the psychology of disorganization. The remaining three weeks of every month are for tasks like creating a bedroom sanctuary, packing wisely for trips, and creating a festive holiday atmosphere. Full of useful information for everyone, from the person who needs simply to clean a messy desk to the person requiring a whole new approach to life; highly recommended for all libraries.

In her first book, 30-year-old UK native Lloyd Webber—daughter of composer Andrew Lloyd Webber—instructs women not on how to find a man but on how to enjoy being a modern single girl. In a style like that of Sex and the City's Carrie Bradshaw, she gives advice on everything from handling bosses and decorating an apartment to laying the groundwork for romance. Her survival tips on attending reunions, family gatherings, and other functions are helpful, but her constant use of abbreviations (e.g., "CL" for conversation list, "GBF" for gay best friend) is off-putting. While references to employing cleaning women and frequently using cabs may limit the book's audience to wealthier readers, its sassy style may broaden its appeal. Optional.

McCarthy, a political refugee from Latvia, offers yet another method to rid oneself of old ways of thinking and begin anew. She describes it as transcendence—the state of lifting oneself out of the morass of past hurts and current pain to see the world with fresh eyes. But rather than explain how this state can be achieved, McCarthy relates stories of people in impossible situations who have stopped trying to change others and the situations they encounter and instead transform themselves. While this first book in a projected trilogy contains heartwarming stories, it fails to explain how to apply its lessons. Optional.

Just for fun is this wonderful little book for anyone harassed by those inevitable signs of aging, e.g., short-term memory loss and income strategies for retirement. In this everything-you-wish-you-didn't-need-to-know guidebook, Padwa (Say the Magic Words: How To Get What You Want from the People Who Have What You Need) discusses midlifers' sense of smell, income possibilities, and retirement havens. She also tackles such issues as ridding oneself of debt and the safety of dying pubic hair. Sure to attract attention and readership; recommended for all public libraries.

The adage of not judging a book by its cover certainly comes into play with this gem by Penthouse columnist and Pet of the Year, clinical psychologist, and certified sex therapist Zdrok, aka Dr. Z. While Zdrok does give male readers pointers on getting women into bed, she spends the bulk of the text helping them learn how to talk to and treat women, providing confidence-building exercises and hygiene tips. The chapters on sex are graphic but well done. Any man who reads this book will increase his chances of meeting and pleasing a woman. Local sensibilities should be taken into account; otherwise, recommended for all libraries.